Kelly’s story

Hi, my name is Kelly Walker, im a 27 year old British women and am married to a man called Mohamed (26) from Egypt. We met in December 2009 while I was on holiday in Egypt. After meeting Mohamed I spent almost a year traveling to Egypt for 2-3 weeks at a time to see him, and to meet his family. We got married in October 2010 and have just celebrated our 2 year anniversary, but sadly we was unable to be together this year to celebrate. After we got married I returned to England to tie things up at home to be able to move to Egypt to be with my husband. As I was self employed this took a little time and was unable to move to Egypt until October 2011. We lived together at his families home in the village that he grew up in, although I had visited on a number of occasions I don’t think I was really prepared for what life would be like to live there. It was a huge culture shock but tried my best to make it a home, but that wasn’t as easy as I would have liked. In a village where everybody knows each other and being the only white non muslim there I felt very isolated pretty much the whole time. My husband would try to make me feel at home as did his family but in a place you don’t feel comfortable even to step out the front door on your own which I cant do it is very hard. Even when I venture out with my husband I feel very conscious as I know that I will constantly be stared at and feel very uncomfortable.
Soon after moving to Egypt I fell pregnant, although I was extremely happy to be pregnant and was so excited about becoming a mum for the first time I couldn’t enjoy the pregnancy like I would have hoped. For the first 3 month I had a doctor that I was unable to communicate with although I did eventually find a doctor that spoke English and that made it a little easier. I had made the decision to go back to England to have the baby and my husband and I applied for a visit visa so my hubby could be there with me, but unfortunately the visa was refused. At that point I had doubts about going home as I didn’t want to deprive my husband of being there for the birth of our first child. But in my seventh month of pregnancy I developed a DVT that took almost 4 weeks to be diagnosed correctly and was hospitalized in Egypt for a week, so at that point my husband and I decided that I had no choice other than to go home to the UK to make sure I received the proper treatment in case there could be any complications.
Our son is now 3 and half months old and is still yet to meet his father, it is a very hard situation to be in knowing that not only my husband is missing out on our sons life but my son is also missing out on getting to know his father.
I would like to return to be with my husband but am having to finish treatment, and am very cautious about raising my son in a place that I know he wont be able to have a normal childhood. As it stands at the moment I am facing the prospect of being a single mother having to raise my son away of his father. With the current immigration rules I will find it virtually impossible to ever be in a situation where I could earn the £18,600 i would need to be able to sponsor my husband for a visa. It really saddens me that my family is being torn apart because our government is putting a price on being a family just because I fell in love with someone from outside the EU, and am know being forced to either live without my husband and only visit a couple times a year or move back to Egypt where I my son wont have the life he deserves.
I am now at a point that I don’t know where to go from here. I spend all day thinking of a way that we can be the happy family that I have always wanted us to be but am running out of options. All I have left is hope that one day these rules will be relaxed so that I and so many others will have a chance at the family life we so desperately want.

10 Comments on “Kelly’s story”

  1. Zed says:

    I think you should get in touch with your local mp. Clearly these rules are unacceptable. It should be according to the minimum wage.

    • kelly walker says:

      i agree with u about the rules. and i will be contacting my mp shortly. thanks for ur comment

    • Hydar Ali says:

      Dear Zed, even the minimum wage will not be fair to some like myself. I have six kids and am over 55. With no job prospect, what can I do as a single parent with 5 kids? The little baby just one year old has gone with his mother too her country and now we are split.Even phone calls are unaffordable for me. These rules are racist and completely illogical.l Even the English test is unjust my wife has a little education in her own language and passing that test might require from her six years of study. She is my wife and the mother of my six British citizens and I love her and have all the rights in the world too be with her and my kids. End of story.

  2. Esme Gregory says:

    Hi you are really brave to try and live in Egypt, but why should you live there all the time it is extemelly unfair that you have to choose between the UK and Egypt. I managed to sponser my husband who is from Algeria before they bought in the new income rules. We had to appeal but we won and he is now here, it took eighteen months. I know it is harder now but don’t give up. I hope that they find these rules unfair in the future or that you can work it out.

    • kelly walker says:

      thanks for ur kind comment.. it is very hard and distressing but im sure sometime in the future we will find a way of making the uk our home. im just praying that something gets done about these rules.. had i of known about the rules changing and not had so much going on at the time with medical problems and pregnancy i may have found a way to do it before but they came in so fast. im just looking forward to my hubby coming to visit for christmas so it gives me a little more time before having to return to egypt

  3. Lilly Eaton says:

    Kelly this may not be a perfect solution but could you move to Ireland and look for a job, you could then bring your husband to live with you in Ireland as you would fall under EU rules. You would not have to pay for your husbands visa and then after a minimum of six months you could return with your husband to the UK under the SURINDER SINGH criteria.

  4. nikki says:

    hi kelly my heart goes out to you because im in the same situation i.m with a turkish man we have been together 4 yrs we have 2 children 1 is 2 years old an my other 1 is 2 half months my partner was refused a visa when fell pregnant with my 2 yr old lttle boy so i had to go back to uk have him alone i then tried to live n turkey because t was affecting my little boy keep coming an goin from turkey to england but fell pregnant again so went back to england to work to save money for the new baby so i could pay to have her in turkey so her dad could not miss out again i totally agree with what your saying how they put a price on you for just wanting to be a family we have just applied for family visa so he can come to england for christmas but think it maybe refused because i took unpaid maternity because i wasnt with the company long enough so got no income to show them good luck with tryin to get settlement in the uk

  5. Charlotte Rouis says:

    I feel for u! I was in the same position but I’m married to a Tunisian. 5 times we applied for a visiting visa still being refused and our daughters going to be 1 in December 😦 it’s heart breaking and destroying me as a person! I now have depression and anxiety. males me sick to think our lives are in the hands of someone else. We have no control over our own happiness x

  6. arnold says:

    All these sad stories of broken families, i am disgusted at our politicians, thier new rules need to be scrapped, cameron and his men[if you wish to call them and him that].are classing all people from outside the eu as bad characters and wanting to come and use our country, can they not see that amongest all humanity there are good people and bad people, how can they class all foreigners as hamefull to uk economy, we have mant cultures here already who contrubute to the diversity of english life, why make stiff rules that judge all foreign people as the same, it’s non sensible, each case and person should be judged individually.

    In my case i have travelled many time to see my philippines fiancee and baby, if i’d travelled only a one or two times ok, but i been back and forth many times to philippines to see them, but it’s not a real solution, why can’t the length of relationship be taken into account and children of the couple be considered, after all babies have no knowledge of what our politions are doing to there future possible lives, i have suffered the death of my mother 94 years old, my aunty few months later, my first family moving away from locality, i am pension income but young at heart, living uturlly on my own. with a lovely girl 34 years my fiancee and 5 months old baby half way across the world, each case should be considered individually, not a inflexable rulings that that takes no account of people’s situation. i am discussed by our government, they walk around with heads in the air with thought for themselves only, guy fawkes had the right idea, sad lonely heart broken mam, arnold.

  7. penny s says:

    hi kelly, think i heard your story or a very similar one on radio 4 a while ago… this is an awful situation.. my daughter is now 6 months old and she has never met her father ! I was living with him in India when i got pregnant and returned to the uk to have her. He applied for a uk tourist visa which was refused so he has never met her. I am moving to india this year – she will be 8 months old then. it infuriates me as i feel all my rights are being taken away from me,my british daughter and my mum who will be seperated from her first grandchild!My partner has studied and worked in the uk previously they had no reason to refuse his tourist visa application. we cannot waste more money re-applying, i am not earning and his salary in india does not equate to much over here. It will be very hard bringing her up in india, we are on our own without any safety net.

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